male Coke-drinkers beware!

(wherein I demonstrate, succinctly and incontrovertibly, that men who prefer Coke are pansies and Pepsi-swilling chicks should shave their jowls)

A new study suggests that REAL MEN like their mass-produced food products 20% more sugary than women (and that's just to get them to recognize the flavor, so even more must be required to support preferential behavior).

Pepsi is acknowledged to be sweeter than Coke, ergo you are less of a man for drinking Coke than Pepsi. QED.

Next?

same-blog posts

I always wondered what was meant by "same-store sales." Now I know ... and knowing has made me stupider:

Best Buy's same store sales -- an important retail industry metric -- fell 5.3 percent from 2007 for the quarter ending Nov. 29. Same-store sales, which worsened every month in the period, are considered a key indicator of a retailer's health because they measure sales at existing stores rather than newly opened ones.

How about just "established store sales"? Leave it to businessmen to mangle language beyond all relevant meaning.

as it was, shall it ever be

My man, it is always about the timing!

Iraqi reporter pulls a Random Task

Who throws a shoe? I mean, really?

I guess if it's someone from the Middle Eastern country you illegally invaded to pillage oil, then I guess that's not really fighting like a girl ... though it kinda is.

any wonder people mistrust 'free' markets?

Free ... to be as $50bn corrupt or as back-asswardsly bankrupt as the multi-millionaire leaders of the corporations wish their companies to be.

sheeple given driving instruction

No more baa-baa behind the wheel of your ca-a-a-rrr! Otherwise, you'll end up filing some ridiculous claims, like:

“In an attempt to kill a fly I drove into a telephone pole”

"On approach to the traffic lights the car in front suddenly broke."

"The car in front hit the pedestrian but he got up so I hit him again"

"I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment."

"The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intention."

"I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way"

"Going to work at 7am this morning I drove out of my drive straight into a bus. The bus was 5 minutes early."

"The accident happened because I had one eye on the lorry in front, one eye on the pedestrian and the other on the car behind."

"I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought."

"I pulled into a lay-by with smoke coming from under the hood. I realised the car was on fire so took my dog and smothered it with a blanket."

Q: Could either driver have done anything to avoid the accident? A: Travelled by bus?


The claimant had collided with a cow. The questions and answers on the claim form were - Q: What warning was given by you? A: Horn. Q: What warning was given by the other party? A: Moo.

"I started to turn and it was at this point I noticed a camel and an elephant tethered at the verge. This distraction caused me to lose concentration and hit a bollard."

"I didn't think the speed limit applied after midnight"

"I knew the dog was possessive about the car but I would not have asked her to drive it if I had thought there was any risk."

Q: Do you engage in motorcycling, hunting or any other pastimes of a hazardous nature? A: "I Watch the Lottery Show and listen to Terry Wogan."

"First car stopped suddenly, second car hit first car and a haggis ran into the rear of second car."

"Windscreen broken. Cause unknown. Probably Voodoo."

"A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face"

"A pedestrian hit me and went under my car"

"I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision and I did not see the other car."

"I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident."

"An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished."

"I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cows."

"Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have."

"I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my head through it."

"The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him."

"I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident."

"As I approached an intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no stop sign had ever appeared before."

"To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front I struck a pedestrian."

"My car was legally parked as it backed into another vehicle."

"I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat found that I had a fractured skull."

"I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road when I struck him."

"The pedestrian had no idea which way to run as I ran over him."

"I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentleman as he bounced off the roof of my car."

"The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth."

"The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of the way when I struck the front end."

"The gentleman behind me struck me on the backside. He then went to rest in a bush with just his rear end showing. "

"I had been learning to drive with power steering. I turned the wheel to what I thought was enough and found myself in a different direction going the opposite way."

"I was backing my car out of the driveway in the usual manner, when it was struck by the other car in the same place it had been struck several times before."

"When I saw I could not avoid a collision I stepped on the gas and crashed into the other car."

"The accident happened when the right front door of a car came round the corner without giving a signal."

"No one was to blame for the accident but it would never have happened if the other driver had been alert."

"I was unable to stop in time and my car crashed into the other vehicle. The driver and passengers then left immediately for a vacation with injuries."

"The pedestrian ran for the pavement, but I got him."

"I saw her look at me twice. She appeared to be making slow progress when we met on impact."

"The accident occurred when I was attempting to bring my car out of a skid by steering it into the other vehicle."

"I knocked over a man; he admitted it was his fault for he had been knocked down before."

what men are like

Brit pop starlet Lily Allen sums it up pretty well:

"I'm not the type to leap on someone. If I fancy someone I'm quite playgroundy about the whole thing, and just punch them on the arm a bit. It certainly breaks the ice. And you keep punching lower and lower until you've got their dick in your hand and then that's it."

the next retail paradigm

We are fast approaching the day when price differentials between online and real-world shops are insignificant. I wonder what will drive consumer behavior in that paradigm? Location won't matter that much (ignoring the differential in shipping costs, which is not often a deal-breaker anyway), and neither will the store. The only stuff you'll need to go to the store for are (likely):

apparel - you have to try some stuff on, unless we get more consistent sizing across (and even sometimes within) brands

perishable food - some food you can easily order online (canned goods), but fresh produce? methinks not

medicine - well, to fill the initial prescription should require some form of identification rigor that is currently beyond the capabilities of the Internet ... that may change soon, but you'll still have to see a doctor to diagnose what's wrong

immediate needs - convenience and construction stores, for instance. If you run out of washers working on the plumbing, you can't wait for parts to be delivered.

Can you think of anything else?

all in your head

Yeah, after 17 years of liberal media whining, some self-serving callous bureaucrats have decided to take that pansy-ass invention, 'Gulf War Syndrome,' and label it a "real" "illness." Pussies. Go take another bullet for your country!

encroaching on our right to idiocy

It's not enough that an 8-year-old shot killed himself by losing control of an Uzi at a gun show in Massachusetts (those liberal scum!), but you rednecks watch out: them minors know what's up, and they're coming to get you, even if you live in a red state! Mwuahahaha

can I bum a fag?

Sometimes people can actually do surprising things.

But the advice remains that you can never really trust a metals trader! :oP

welcome to the machine!

Partly amusing, partly sad commentary on modern life. We're all become technological 'yes' men (or women, or bi-sexual, trans-gendered, hedonistic squirrel-worshippers).

it finally happened

A major mainstream news organization published an article promoting further research into your mom! Stunning!

low-hanging fruit

I be there are a heck of a lot of 'low-hanging fruit' that the government regulators can harvest nowadays!

the sound of breaking glass

OK, so in some ways the British are not nearly as sophisticated as Americans tend to give them credit. Foreign donation scandals by, essentially, frat buddies who enjoy getting so pissed they're randomly violent? Stiff upper lip indeed - it's swollen after you punched me, my good man! lol

However, in other ways, especially in matters of public debate yes, yes they are. Could you ever imagine that bus ad in the US? Heck, Top Gear simply said "NASCAR sucks!" and they were nearly lynched in the South. Fox News, fair and balanced as it is, would never air a "god" vs. "no-god" debate. So much for presenting two sides of an issue.

whither US innovation?

This is the kind of stuff University research would find hordes of undergrads to help study! Why aren't they?

always de-regulation. always.

That's what Republicans stand for. I am surprised, though, that the multi-billion-dollar entertainment industry wasn't able to get their way on this intellectual property initiative ... must be because they're all pinko commie liberals.

it takes a dunce

to deduce she's fit to be vice-commander in chief:

too short

Not the rapper, but this list full of epic Bush fail.

As I've stated before, I disagree with nearly every major decision made / legislation coercively passed by the administration.

America's top export: hypocrisy

This is stunning in its blatancy.

One result of this standoff is that the United States, despite being one of the primary authors of the U.N.'s Convention on the Rights of Children, which specifies that governments must take appropriate measures to protect children from "all forms of physical or mental violence, injury or abuse, neglect or negligent treatment, maltreatment or exploitation," is one of only two nations that have not ratified it. The other is Somalia; 192 nations have ratified it.

Land of the free (to beat your children). I guess us rednecks worry that wife-beating will be outlawed next. If I don't resort to five across the eyes, I don't know how I'd ever convince that fat slut to crap out six more kids. Now, if I hit her too hard and break her three remaining teeth, so she can barely eat for a week, I might get some capital punishment up in harr, and that's no fun.

Go (black and) Blue!

According to my colleague Liz Gershoff of the University of Michigan, a leading expert on corporal punishment of children, the main arguments that have so far prevented us from ratifying it include the ones you would expect—it would undermine American parents' authority as well as U.S. sovereignty—plus a couple of others that you might not have expected: It would not allow 17-year-olds to enlist in the armed forces, and (although the Supreme Court's decision in Roper v. Simmons has made this one moot, at least for now) it would not allow executions of people who committed capital crimes when they were under 18.

All that fancy Ivory talk, bitch, will get the back of your head pulverized by a well-aimed donkey punch. Now stop jawing with that ugly ol' gap-toothed mug of yours and start working them gums on this here "rod."

WARNING: aneurysm-inducing idiocy

Governor Granholm has Canada on the border, and she was even born there - in a foreign country(!) - QED!

You can tell she wishes she'd paid attention to those trade missions instead of who was tasering her extended family, lol.


Watch CBS Videos Online

give that man a Nobel!

Well, if you take a large enough sample, someone's bound to be right, but still, impressive! Especially considering that it took until the latter half of the 20th century for our government to acknowledge that smoking leads to health problems. Ducking fuh.

still a dangerous precedent

Allowing nuclear-armed India to avoid the non-proliferation treaty. I can't say I see how voting the measure down will drive the Indians to ally themselves with Iran - this is the same style of broad, culturally-blind assumptions that have re-created a Vietnam-style quagmire in Iraq.

this just goes to show...

... that you can teach an old, forgetful dog new tricks! Haha, like that? I thought so ... :oP

Sarah Palin + FOX News = Infomercial

funny, I do the same thing when she speaks:



As a giant piece of lying political slime, Blair is STILL more honest and open about the difficulties of the "War on Terror" than just about any US politician. Shameful.

only a fool would revel in Lehman's failure

Count me among those fools!

If you want to have a free market, you have to have consequences to risk as an appropriate deterrent against future malfeasance. God knows you can't trust Bush's slash & burn policy to regulatory oversight, and the worst thing would be to let banks believe any of them are immune. Watch AIG and WaMu for signs of imminent failure (though I really can't understand how AIG could be SO leveraged that its physical assets' value would be outweighed by the positions of just one of its many divisions). Anyway, I haven't been following AIG closely though, so maybe the market is right in its heavy devaluation of the firm. It went from $40/share to around $20/share between May - Sep, and now it's trading at the sub-$4/share level. That's a tad extreme.

The Value of the "Liberal" Media 2

I'll put the headline here just for effect:

Pakistan order to kill US invaders
Key corps commanders of Pakistan's 600,000-strong army issued orders last night to retaliate against "invading" US forces that enter the country to attack militant targets

Well, it's Australian, but it manages to get the information out to a wider audience. With allies like these, who needs are enemies?

The Bible is my Anti-Spore!

Oh for God's sake ... I knew this was coming.

I especially like this attempt at an argument. Stunning. Just because you believe strongly in creationism doesn't mean you *must* defy logic.

But because Will Wright has brainwashed Frank Drake into thinking that life in the universe gave rise to “super humans” on other planets that are better than us. God would never create something better than himself, it is not possible as God is perfect in every way. And once again, I reiterate that man was created in His image.

For starters, equating humans to God is heresy, though through the creator's (of the blog, not "the Creator") tenuous grasp of logic, I don't think he fully understands what he implies. Saying man was created in God's "image" does NOT mean that we are perfect and/or like God in every way. Why? If we were perfect, we'd be God (which we cannot be). So obviously we were made in His image, but not 100% - which leaves room for improvement! With all the sin and strife, I really cannot believe someone thinks that we could not be "improved" upon in some way, such as, perhaps, a higher standard of morals or a stronger conscience.

And just because Dr. Drake has a fantastical vision of "super" sapiens that doesn't conform to someone's creationist ideas does not mean he is challenging God or has somehow been "brainwashed" by ... a game designer? Come on! Drake is an astrophysicist for Christ's sake - he's smarter than that! lol

And for that matter, so are Jesus and God. Actually, I think Armageddon will be retribution upon the truly ignorant, such as those people who claim to be avowed followers of Jesus the Christ, yet who insist upon literal interpretations of the Bible. Have you read the New Testament? IT'S ALMOST ALL METAPHOR! YOUR "SAVIOR" WAS A LIBERAL INTELLECTUAL! lmfao You can read parables about the sower and the seed, the candle under the wicker basket, etc., yet you can't comprehend that God may not have created the Earth in 7 24-hour days? Believing in God or Jesus the Christ does not give one leave to abandon logic.

The Value of the "Liberal" Media 1

Ok, here we go. In defense of a liberal media, which does its part to help Americans (the vast majority of whom don't travel internationally) understand the world of which they are a very powerful part.

An insight into daily life within North Korea. The Reps/right wing/conservatives/neocons would argue that the article is "sympathizing" with an enemy who's part of the "Axis of Evil." That's bullshit. People need to be reminded, apart from all the blithering rhetoric otherwise, that there are real people over there, leading real lives, and it's not like the entire population is one homogenous horde opposed to America.

Besides, militarily it is advantageous to know more about your enemy than less, so all the "liberal" media is doing is giving more information to our future cannon fodder so that they can better understand their enemy - and annihilate him/her! Now THAT'S what I call true patriotism! (Not that ignorance prevents us from efficiently killing dirty towelheads elsewhere.)

Esquire interviews Rupert Murdoch

His bias bleeds through the lines like the blood of the thousands he helped kill in Iraq.

Unfair? Nah. See, he's made an art of distortion, so much so that "facts" and "opinions" are indistinguishable in his worldview. And he's made Fox News a powerful voice for the ignorant, illogical, and ill-informed in the US - instead of going toe-to-toe with "intellectuals," they largely just cut mics and have idiotic shouting matches about trivial topics to create a virtual 'fog of war' in politics and in the favor of the right-wing zealot idiots who now control the country.

You wonder where the Reps get off lying so much and so easily - he opened the door for disinformation. O'Reilly perfectly fair and balanced, that's why Britney's sister is a slut and her parents are unfit, while Sarah Palin's daughter is an inspiration to us all and her mother could (and should!) be Vice President.

This bit of illogic is a gem: he didn't become a US citizen only for business reasons, he just had to be a US citizen to own a network. Hmmm ... that's not a business reason? I don't care if he sees his business life intertwined with (or as) his personal life, or makes no distinctions along those lines, but to pursue a business goal he changed citizenships. Just because he engages in double- or triple-think doesn't mean the rest of us do.

And if it weren't for the investigative reporting of the NY Times, this country would be far worse off. I wish I had the time to compile a list of the breaking, relevant news they've provided over the years. What does Fox News have to its credit? The fact that half its viewers still believe the US found WMDs in Iraq? Are you fucking kidding me? And you'd denigrate the Times?

Makes me want to get rid of my citizenship ...

Moment of ... hypocrisy. Again.

These are becoming almost too numerous to keep track of.



I like Huckabee, but I despise the GOP. I'd never vote for Huckabee. The disconnect between the approval rating of Congress and the individual re-election, district-by-district, of its representatives is another clear and terrifying example of the idiocracy of American sheeple and is the direct result of their biased, hyper-individualism. "My guy's right - it's your guy that's the problem!" Retarded. Where are the concentration internment camps when you need them? "Your IQ must be this high to get out." lol



Another hypocrisy: making "service" your speech-day motto, but having your other preparatory speakers denigrate those who actually do service. And the American sheeple love it!

Republican choice

Of course you have a choice, just so long as it remains our decision whether or not the government will allow you to make that choice! As Orwell put it, "All animals are equal; but some are more equal than others." Palin's family made the choice they're going to deny everyone else, and really, at their core, people have a lot of difficulty with this hypocrisy - except for the evangelical right, who're used to the suspension of logic.

Impalin' earmarks ...

... but for keeping the money. You know what else gets doled out from the general fund? Legislators' compensations.

Bill Maher is my soulmate

And Paul Begala is awsome. "... look at George Bush, he's kind of disgraced me entire gender and ethnicity." I love it.

john.he.is

And that's a fact, yes it is!

as the saying goes ...

"If it's good enough to flush down my toilet, it's good enough for the city of San Antonio!"

They can get this industrious DIY-er to keep the plant smelling like roses!

tree frog

Australasian extinction fail

the next generation of music piracy?

Ushered in by the precedent-setting:
radio tower protection fail

it's about ... character

Namely, the character of the letter 'W'. I loved it at The Shrub's acceptance speech in 2004, the way they projected giant gold 'W's to flank the stage on both sides. The TV clips largely ignored them, but every so often when the camera zoomed out you can see them.

Bush's Victory Speech 2004 | Viral | SPIKE.com

All that propaganda and patriotism, those simplistic, single-color banners ("royal" blue?), barren except for a lone symbol, does remind me of an earlier time, of another "historic" moment. When was it? Where was it ... oh yeah!

Gosh, those were the days ...

And the Reps have the gall to call Obama just "a celebrity?" George's shrubbery hath extended even beyond a mere person, he's taken over an entire letter of the alphabet (and here is the store to prove it!).

vetting a veep

OK, there is obviously a lot of controversy over this Palin selection. One of my favorite micro-debates is on her family's right to privacy (as Obama may point out, Constitutional scholar that he is, there is no right to privacy guaranteed in the Bill of Rights, although maybe it should be included in order to offset the violation of the right to unlawful search and seizure that the government is allowed under the "Patriot" Acts).

Okay, to do what Reps despise and re-focus on the issue. McCain and the Reps are squealing over Palin's privacy, that how she rears her family has nothing to do with her fitness for public office. Ok, fine, but then please explain how the following examples fit:

The campaign says the form included such detailed questions as: Have you been faithful in your marriage? Have you ever paid for sex? Have you ever downloaded pornography? Have you ever used or purchased drugs?

Now, as far as I can tell, those are all questions on a candidate's morals. If it turns out that the candidate did use drugs, like Clinton, The Shrub, and Obama, it's okay to cite Palin's drug use. So if those examples of morals are okay, why not the family unit? If you've been divorced, and the politicians themselves use that as a screen for "fitness", then why can't the American public? And where are your morals displayed anywhere more so than your family unit? You're going to treat your spouse/children a lot closer to the morals you actually practice (by definition) than those you just preach. And that's why the Reps desperately want to present a (n often false) squeaky-clean moral facade that is above question, because the more you question, the more hypocrisy you find.

And don't even get me started on how Stewart pwnd Gingrich over the meaning of the word "decision." Fabulous.


And if you have the appetite for even more Palin hypocrisy ("she was for wasteful pork barrels before she was against them!", "she was for Alaskan independence ... and still probably is!"), have a gander. Brilliant.

what is the opposite of beer goggles?

Whatever you call this drink, lol.

Parkour (free running) = cool. Sport? Not really. Marial art? Hardly. Hardcore? A bit, but not nearly as much as swamp soccer!

the sad thing is

While we're debating global warming, it's already too late... the CO2 we've already admitted will remain in the atmosphere for decades (at least), and our overall emissions are not dropping yet, therefore we are going to continue adding to the cumulative amount of CO2 in the atmosphere for a long while after we notice the effects of global warming. Once you start seeing the effects, it is already bordering on being too late to do anything about the situation.

Batman: The Dark Knight

All the reviews are deservedly positive. I think Heath Ledger will be nominated for Best Supporting Actor, but I am skeptical he'd win (even though some people claim it's "not just a comic book movie" it's still a comic book movie!).

I thought Heath Ledger nailed the character of the Joker. I am not sure if it led to his inadvertent (or otherwise) OD on sleeping pills, but I find it difficult to believe that the role would have disturbed him so much. I mean, it is so far detached from a 'real' person that I can't see an actor having anything but gleeful fun with the role, since there are no character boundaries for the Joker's mania. Personally, I would've stayed another 2 1/2 hours in the theatre just watching his anti-social antics.

I was never that impressed with Jack Nicholson's portrayal, nor did I like the more campy screen adaptations of Batman in general. I grew up reading the comics and watching the fantastic animated series on WB that I always viewed Batman as a very dark/tormented character. I mean, the Joker killed how many Robins? I recall one was left to drown in a vat of acid!

OK, but enough reviewers have already fawned over Ledger's performance, and despite reading many of those reviews before seeing the film, I was still impressed. As for the rest of the cast, they were good, but not great. I like Bale as Batman, and he's also able to pull off Bruce Wayne quite convincingly (and all I can say is praise Jesus that Katie Holmes did not reprise her role from Batman Begins - her performance was so void it threatened to envelope part of the film!). Gary Oldman was really good. Aaron Eckhart was good, perhaps as good, maybe a little better, than Bale, but his character had to go through such a transformation ... the stakes were highest for his character, and I think that he fell just a little below what could have made his role as memorable as Ledger's. I think Dent wasn't edgy enough before his transformation, and that hindered the believability of Two-Face. Alternatively, his character could have shown more conflict/confusion post-transformation (I thought he too-readily accepted the Joker's manipulation).

There were also some minor logical/technical gripes, such as:

- how did the Joker escape from Bruce Wayne's benefit?
- how did Dent survive that limo car crash, unscathed to boot, after purposefully unbuckling his seat-belt (after shooting the driver)?
- the chase scene in the tunnel was poorly-shot (as many reviewers have commented).

There were a few other minor things I noticed ... if I remember I'll write them, but for now that's all I got.

Media Reviews

I'm going to start reviewing all the films I watch and books I read, more for the benefit of my own memory than anything else.

failure alert!

Bush fails again. What, did he look into Medvedev's "soul" as well, the fucking retard? Not that his failure matters, since he neither reads the news or listens to anyone but his parroting yes-men lackeys. The "CEO" President couldn't be any more apt in prescribing exactly his idiotic shortcomings.

still a lame excuse

... rationalizing stupidity doesn't make it any less stupid or any less a person's choice. It's the 'everyone else jumped off a bridge' argument, except in this case it's 'everyone else around me appeared to make superficial choices, so I took that to mean I didn't have to think through my own actions ..." SHEEP!

In other news, yay for freedom! haha I wonder if they use the same argument for freedom of speech as they do for the definition of porn: "I'll recognize a breach of your civil liberties when I see one."

the face of tyranny in Zimbabwe

Stunningly brave. I bet the Guardian helped pay for his extrication. Heck, with Zimbabwe's inflation, they probably bought first class tickets for him and his family to Tahiti!

I'm OK to dwive, honesht
In other news, researchers at the University of Michigan claim that the nearly-insignificant difference in crash statistics between two equally stupid systems for the legal drinking age finds that one severely stupid system is only slightly less idiotic than the other.

Stunning amounts of time and money were exerted, and no one mentioned the pink elephant in the room: make the legal drinking age LOWER than the legal driving age, and you'll have less drunk-driving accidents. This proposition appears counter-intuitive only to idiots, which is why the US has not adopted it.

a bad PR day in biofuels
Is there no such thing as bad PR? I would think a "secret" report by the World Bank on the economic damage being caused by biofuels would be considered, um, pretty bad.

Most people are not going to blame the terrible choices of biofuel feedstock which have been made (corn ethanol is bullshit, and clearing virgin rain forest for palm oil is even more putrid bullshit). What will stick in people's minds is the massive spike in food prices attributed (largely) to these ridiculously inefficient or improperly deployed crops.

The only silver lining? At least the report makes Bush look bad! :o)

hire marx four being emfatik!

In a way, the teacher could be implying that maybe the room was such a shithole it deserved an exclamation mark!

I don't think the examiner was being broad-minded enough. Maybe "room" could be taken in the global, socio-economic sense as "room to grow." I mean, on the one hand, some plunderer's are getting rich exploiting and enabling the Chinese regime. On the other, not everyone takes such action lying down.

I would've asked for more clarity from the youth on which stance he was against.

How do you say 'hallelujah' in Martian?

Is it holy water? I'm waiting until the Martian bacteria accept their Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, into their tiny microbial hearts.

a typical day in the office

The threat of "inadvertent" nuclear apocalypse keeps us sharp!

Good to know we haven't backed away too far from the brink!

And the every-pressing question, has Hiroshima become too normal?

idle talk

A good article on the benefits of turning off your car instead of letting it idle.

school-shooting drive-by?

Next one that happens, you know you can blame Obama!

apoplectic

Now this is a word I like! The Dictionary.com definition is more technical, but Merriam-Webster's captures the modern usage very succinctly:

apoplectic

1: of, relating to, or causing stroke
2: affected with, inclined to, or showing symptoms of stroke
3: of a kind to cause or apparently cause stroke (an apoplectic rage); also : greatly excited or angered (was apoplectic over the news)

nerdkore

Ewe ar such a NERD!

In the land of the recently freed from prison

"They hate us for our freedom."

Yes, King Shrub, that and our peace-loving way of life, lol.

Make-mud Ahma - Ajabadah .. babajabadah ... goo-goo, ga-ga

In another conspiracy of non-reporting by devil-worshipping, gay liberal abortionist baby-raping Western capitalist-whore journalists, Iranian President Mahmud Ahmadinejad was actually correct when he stated there were no homosexuals in Iran. That is true. They have all fled elsewhere to seek asylum, lol.

taser-on-taser violence

See, after the Virginia Tech shootings, some people thought the only solution was to better arm teachers. I agree. Giving weapons to inadequately trained civilians is, in general, an effective deterrent from deadly violence. In fact, the only solution to most violent confrontations is more violence. It's not like easy access to weaponry can escalate otherwise innocuous situations into a life-or-death struggle, people simply don't behave that way. People are nearly always rational and react in proportion to the affront dealt them.

Take this case for instance. The only clear solution to this horrible display of taser-on-taser violence is more tasers. Imagine if the van had a taser how much easer of a time it would've had defending itself against both men and short-circuiting their violent intents altogether. Why are lawmakers so blind to such obvious, simple, eminently workable solutions? Goddamned left-wing conspirators ... if we left it to the crazy Belgians, we'd all have drowned in our own impotence already.

You know, we always seem to come to an impasse in this country when it comes to guns. I believe we, as Americans, should just stick to the things we know how to do and do well, like teaching people how to drink responsibly.

(and drive even better - I wonder if the two are related?)

why they hate us, part 1 trillion

Hmmm ... a trillion for wanton destruction, and a paltry 1 billion (promised aide feeds no mouths) for helping people eat.

What was that about hearts and minds? Apparently there is no space in the agenda for stomachs. I mean, how could anyone truthfully assert that we have our priorities anywhere but in exactly the right place? It's not like the haves try to instigate the have-nots. However, to be fair, people have actually done the acts depicted, and in the name of Islam. So why do people get so offended by the replaying of facts? These things happened. It is offensive to Muslims to blame all Islam because of the acts of a few, this is true, but this is also known as freedom of speech. We give you the freedom to worship whatever you like, a freedom which many Islamic countries do not have, and you cannot choose your freedoms piecemeal - they come as a set, take them all or leave them all.

secondary intelligence

Very clever indeed - much more clever than using contraceptives. How did the mother not notice her daughter was pregnant? That's kind of a difficult thing to hide, even if you are tubby.

the decider

So first he tells our enemies to bring it on, then he blames the servicemen for his televised premature ejaculation (of 'victory') bullshit media stunt.

This is the behavior of a "war-time" President? Not in living memory ...

This just in!
Iraqis everywhere are bathing in the sweet smell of victory!

Ave Ma-lmfao

I had trouble deciding whether to add this to my YouTube playlist as "comedy" or "music" ... when the wind catches his papal ... whatever that thing is on his shoulders, he looks like a cute little white Nazi eagl- dove, like a peace-loving, non-anti-aircraft firing Hitler youth dove.

canufacturing monsent

This is how we do.

not so crazy after all

Rudy Giuliani was one of the few who defended Barack Obama when he rattled the sabre in Pakistan's direction. Turns out the US military also seems to think that the junior senator from Illinois isn't so crazy after all.

what're role models for?

I'd be willing to bet that she was Karl Rove's!

holy ... living ... g-o-d

NSFW (in some parts of the world only - I love living in Europe!)


Keeley Hazell Nude Photo Shoot - Click here for more amazing videos

a varied agglomeration of schnitzels

St Peter? Nah, I won't be coming up after all ...
Great to know that the namesake of the Zell-Lurie Institute is engaging the great satan! Here's a tip to budding entrepreneurs - don't let morals get in the way of profit, that's bad business.

Yo, what can I get for this bling?
Invest in pwnage! I think classifying pawn shops "financial stocks" is a stretch by anyone's imagination, lol.

Shell-outs to the Sell-outs
Fuck the pittance checks GWB sends. How can people be so stupid as to think those help?

Too high-class for Florida?
Nothing says I fuck my cousin/sister/uncle's goats like having sack hanging from your bumper. How does a gun-store owner claim any moral authority in this? I also love how one of the Republicans had "truck nutz" on his vehicle, lmfao.

50 first shots
See, he just kept forgetting due to the short-term memory loss induced by too many Adam Sandlar movies. If they made 50 repeated, unnecessarily deadly mistakes, shouldn't they at least be forced to apologize 50 times? How unjust that they only had to apologize once! Unfair!

Buying votes, selling souls
I love that we're being patronized by our own government, receiving token amounts of money in order to placate the masses and/or coerce them into frivolous spending. Bang on, that's exactly what we need more of! "Hey, we drove this car into a ditch going 100mph, I say we gun the throttle until we hit 120, that should help immensely!"

won't you be my neighbor?

I is so hongrie.

Karmapa Number 17, come on down!

I can't bear the suspense of Karmapan Idol: is Ugyen Trinley Dorje the 17th reincarnation, or is Trinley Thaye Dorje? I hope that Ugyen does turn out to be a Chinese spy, that'll add a much-needed, tearful dramatic twist to the long-running series!

TiVo-me, baby!
Another, highly unlikely explanation could be that people realized there was a reality beyond the glowing screen, that that reality could be even more interesting than cyclic, predictable programming, and that they didn't need constant, mind-numbing entertainment to fill every dreary moment of their inane lives ... but I doubt that very much.

danrom

What can I say, I won't vote for McCain. I can't help it, I'm just a single-issue voter, and he just doesn't do it for me. Once you go green, there's no going back!

Today, I felt like I was dressed like a bum.

a voiceless instrument

I bring you a voiceless instrument.
I strained to reach a note which was
too high in my heart, and the string broke.
While masters laugh at the snapped cord,
I ask you to take my lute in your hands
and fill its hollowness with your songs.

[from Rabindranath Tagore's The Fugitive]

so what?

[our government released new theme song for data privacy]

And I've had scag
I've had speed
I've jacked up until I bleed
So what, so what
So what, so what you boring little cunt
Well who cares, who cares what you do
Who cares, who cares about you
You, you, you, you

for rizzle?

Seriously, are these the best attacks the right can muster? "Your grandpa was a good-for-nothing, from which it logically follows that you are weak on national security." What a load of boogers.

It's only 6 months until the election, and they're already grasping at straws? This bodes very well for the Democrats, especially if Obama is the nominee.

The kicker - since Obama's mom died of cancer, the Right is barred from making any "yo momma" slams. Doesn't that suck! Time to hire new talking heads.

untruth!

CNN reports a "darker" side to loveable Audrey Tatou.
Wrong - this isn't her first flirtation with the dark(er) side.

hackers target epileptics

That just sounds like an odd list of enemies: eBaum, Scientology, and epileptics. How do they decide who to attack, create random word generators and pick the top 3 coherent results?

turn back the clock

on women's rights! lol

do not pass 'go'

In fact, don't even pass near your local elementary school. That's a great tactic with some gaping holes - I sure hope accidental clicks don't send FBI agents on false alarms (I'm sure there has to be some kind of pattern to the activity). Also, that'd be a really nasty way to mess with someone - send them a virus that clicks on such links repeatedly and have the FBI raid the target's home.

Interesting stuff you find buried in the news sometimes ...

4000 and counting

Nice milestone. I especially like how nearly one-fifth of the fatalities aren't even the result of enemy action. "Bring it on," indeed, Mr. Bush. I guess Clinton was Eisenhower's exception, because this is exactly the type of unfounded, false machismo that most true military men avoid. Paid off nicely for Bush's business associates though, that's for sure.

So if a veteran see others giving George W. Fucknuts the finger, will he feel better? Doubtful ...

it's the environmentalism, stupid

Finally, programs are starting to target consumers' wallets. These are the types of programs that will really make a difference.

apparently it's tradition

I was somewhat taken aback by the popularity of Bjorn Borg apparel abroad, but I didn't know that the premiere brand (which, incidentally, I vehemently dislike) Lacoste was also founded by a tennis champ.

2008 Bullshit Awards

Multivariate analysis of exit-polls indicate this is a shoe-in to win:

“Collectors actually care about consumers,” said Rozanne Andersen, general counsel of ACA International, the main industry trade group. “They want to teach consumers how to get out of debt. They’re trying to put themselves out of business.”

So the industry is trying to put itself out of business? lol Are the people running the debt collection agencies aware of this? Apparently not, as the next paragraph illustrates:

If so, they are doing a poor job. So many people are in so much debt that the government says bill collecting is one of the fastest-growing businesses. By 2016, employment in it is projected to exceed half a million workers, up 23 percent in a decade.

Instead of making the big loan sharks pay, the US has once again decided to squeeze the middle class yet again. Brilliant strategy.

“Why not set an example of Bear Stearns, the guys who have this record of dog-eat-dog, we’re brass knuckles, we’re tough?” asked William A. Fleckenstein, president of Fleckenstein Capital in Issaquah, Wash., and co-author with Fred Sheehan of “Greenspan’s Bubbles: The Age of Ignorance at the Federal Reserve.” “This is the perfect time to set an example, but they are not interested in setting an example. We are Bailout Nation.”

We are? We bail who out? Not the hardworking people that need it most (unless you work at the Big 3, but that's technically a buyout). You know who's not affected by any of this? The super-rich. I love the false precision here:

“When a yacht is over 328 feet, it’s so big that you lose the intimacy,” says Tork Buckley, editor of The Yacht Report. “On the other hand, you’ve got bragging rights. No question, that’s a very strong part of the motivation.”

Yes, if the yacht is 327 feet, it's extremely intimate (like a twin bed). However, at 329 feet, you lose sight of the bow over the horizon, and so it becomes far less intimate (like a king bed). I am so glad I have 'experts' around to tell me how to judge mega-yachts - I'd feel so lost in my overwhelming debt without such guidance.

So the lesson is: if you are rich or powerful enough, you can make any excuse you want and people will buy it. If you're one of those unfortunate "little people" who have to pay taxes and fend off debt collectors, your excuses fall on deaf ears. Whether its financial markets or the environment, everyone knows there is no reward in leading by example. So people shy away from doing so at every opportunity.

political spin crash lands

If it were anywhere but America, this would be unbelievable. A couple choice juxtapositions.

First, when you read this:

Rep. James Oberstar, D-Minnesota, who heads the committee and who has called the situation "one of the worst safety violations" he has ever seen, is scheduled to hold a hearing April 3 to ask why the airline may have allegedly put its passengers in danger.

that's the editor talking, not your brain. Whither journalistic ethics? Whose interest is CNN trying to protect with that phrasing? Its own. The lawyers probably said you have to avoid making a claim, even though saying "put its passengers in danger" is an accurate description, seeing as how the laws are there to minimize the risk, and in this instance Southwest's negligence increased that risk. That's called "the truth" and what the journalists are doing is increasing the distance between you and it.

For those of you for whom English is a first and only language, another word for "risk" is "danger." The business-savvy right-wing media doesn't want to scare you about your potential death due to corporate negligence (it's too busy pushing ethnic stereotypes. 2 black guys, 1 white girl, and no cups in sight. I mean, you don't even have to say 'rape' and the idea of them going necro appears in more than half of white Amerikaz minds).

Anyway, back to the business of manufacturing consent (in this case, apathy toward your mortality, as opposed to that of the self-serving, self-perpetuating military-industrial-congressional complex (which also happens to be heavily invested in journalism). See, the word "risk" sounds like a financial term, it's been depleted of its more visceral connotations by the false fortunes of the stock market, which people already don't understand, so the ambiguity of that word is compounded by the syntactical obfuscation of the preceding sentence fragment.

So if you're a media-savvy CEO being lightly grilled by an incompetent, unethical journalist, take notes:

"We were surprised yesterday to get that notification by the FAA as well. The Wall Street Journal yesterday reported as late as last month the FAA said that it had no safety issues with Southwest Airlines."

You get that? Yesterday, a newspaper, in no way connected to the aviation industry (and now owned by safety guru Rupert Murdoch) reported that "a month ago" (also known as: before these safety violations were made public), the FAA said something noncommittal about Southwest Airlines ... (he said, she said, but the WSJ said it was safe!). So if the planes crash, are families going to seek damages from the WSJ for libel, for creating a false impression of safety? Idiots.

This is the equivalent of George Bush standing at Ground Zero and saying "this site is safe because I read last week in my briefing that the CIA did not consider the WTC at serious risk from terrorists."

Yes, I realize that some people without glazed-over sheep-eyes (unfortunately not enough) might pick up on such bullshit, but if they say anything they'll be labeled liberal commies and they'll give up b/c it's just some paperwork regarding some perfunctory air safety check, and those checks are so burdensome in these hard times, with airlines struggling to find extra losses from which to pay executives' their undeserved bonuses. Really, I know 113 people who'd disagree with such sentiments, if they were alive to share them. All it takes is a small bit of passion, combined with awareness.

It is in no way outrageous to be outraged by Southwest's negligence.

that's progress

So, let me get this straight. Almost since he got into office, Bush has done everything in his power to underfund the EPA, undercut their existing legislation, and enacted powder-puff, feel-good, political capitalistic bullshit (everyone remember "Clean Skies"? yeah? Remember how the critics said that it wasn't even going as far as the Clean Air Act would go if it were enforced?). Then, they actually nudge standards up a bit, not as far as they should go, give counties an extraordinarily lenient timeline to comply (when many still haven't complied with 80's-era regulations), and label it progress.

That's life!

Oh, and when it's not "progress" per se, then it's called the business cycle (as if it were as natural as geese migration). Companies consolidate to broaden horizons, expand opportunities, diversify their portfolio. Then they consolidate to focus on core values, spinning off businesses. Then new businesses start up, either growing fast in the vacuum left by consolidation or being eaten by the bigger corporations. It's all cyclical, and it's all artificial, and it has about the same intrinsic value as the fashion cycle (bell-bottoms today, corporate mega-banks in the future). Think of all the capital (human, time, actual money, infrastructure, etc.) wasted because big companies can't keep their operations tidy and small companies have to clamber up the corporate food chain to compete. The advancement of civilization is not accomplished through turnover, and "new ideas" shouldn't only come about through waste.

There are better ways if only people would think more often.

movin' on up!

in the star scale. I'm all for playing Frogger with the Earth's orbit and dodging potentially extinction-level-event-inducing comets and asteroids!

Welcome to the new world order

... of institutionalized incompetence.

Will the card contain on it my musical preferences, linked to my credit/debit cards, for easy and convenient purchases from online music retailers (the content accessed through my registered mobile communications device, of course!)?

Incompetence, redux
I'm so glad that our military-industrial-congressional complex monkeys have evolved to the point, in 2007, that things like building something to specifications, while being courteous, is viewed as a "bold move," lol. Fucking idiots. The people whining about Boeing are just as stupid as the idiots around Detroit and other car manufacturing hubs that cry about keeping American jobs by buying American cars. If you FUCKING MORONS would just look under the hood of the vehicles in question, you would see that your precious "American-made" automobiles have roughly the same percentage of components made outside the United States (Canada, Mexico, Brazil) as the "foreign" competition. In fact, some foreign car companies (e.g., Toyota) manufacture entire vehicles in the United States just to appease America's stone-age nationalistic proclivities.

Institutionalized bigotry
I also enjoy how this article conveniently excludes the 2000 race, where Bush was able to undermine McCain by suggesting he had fathered an illegitimate black child.

Institutionalized apathy
I don't know ... ever since the government increased the dosage of Prozac in the local drinking water supply, I find myself fretting far less over the current global destruction of the oceans.

no absolutes

Everyone always talks about emissions per person. Sure that's one way to make it more relevant to people, but at the same time, the Earth doesn't really care because objectively there is a certain amount of CO2 released regardless of the number of passengers on a trans-atlantic flight!

preach on, brother!

So true!

I hope they didn't goof and cite the soldiers' BMIs, which should be higher than the average citizens'.

I was SO right!

CentACS reports that "studies show that the length of sleep is not what causes us to be refreshed upon waking. The key factor is the number of complete sleep cycles we enjoy. Each sleep cycle contains five distinct phases, which exhibit different brain- wave patterns. For our purposes, it suffices to say that one sleep cycle lasts an average of 90 minutes:

* 65 minutes of normal, or non-REM (rapid eye movement), sleep
* 20 minutes of REM sleep (in which we dream)
* Final 5 minutes of non-REM sleep.

FAIL

What the fuck, I know fashion comes in cycles, but how can people be so dumb again, almost within the same generation? Certainly most of the higher-up corporate lapdogs were around in the 1970s to witness this exact same event.

Those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

PS - doesn't anyone know cute, fluffy puppies are just Jihadist-terrorists-in-waiting? How can you be so naive?

the endless mirror

Jesus Christ. I know pop culture, like fashion, moves cyclically, but for God's sake must it be so blatantly derivative?

I think Lindsay can be pretty hot at times, but she looks ridiculous in those photos. Unattractive. Maybe she should've gotten drunk, that couldn't have hurt.

Oh well. At least American tabloids aren't the most distorting lens with which we can view reality. Lohan isn't just a star, or a megastar, she's a freakin' galaxy, lol.

ultimate 'your mom' joke

You simply cannot beat this.

Why, because she's German?

No, because she's your mom!

when $49,000,000 is not legit enough

Go to MSU, see Dubai.

Sounds like a better deal than getting a degree from there! Oh Snap!

Can I write off the purchase?

My doctor wecommended Wii-hab for my chronic condition.

vindication anyone?

Britney finally deemed unfit to live on her own!

killing in the name of (electrical modernity)

I'm firmly in support of thermo-nuclear power. Dangerous? Not nearly so much as people believe, and it doesn't even hold a candle to coal.

China has the world's most dangerous mines, and the government has closed thousands of small mines since 2006 in an effort to reduce fatalities by consolidating the industry into larger, more efficient operations. Last year, the number of mining fatalities dropped by one-fifth to 3,786 deaths, still the highest figure in the world. [according to the IHT]

Granted, China is pretty bad from all safety aspects (if I had to bet money on the next nuclear plant disaster, "somewhere in China" would be my first choice).

What? Athletes complaining about steroids in Chinese food? Heck, I won't even touch chicken unless it's been irradiated and has at least 3 head-like growths! I think in the 2008 Olympics, what the world will see is a 2^nd-world country trying desperately (and mostly superficially) to be considered part of the traditional First World.

That's not a knock against China per se, I think they have every right to get there, but I think the speed at which they are trying is going to leave the internal workings of the country as hollow as the old Soviet attempt (and current Russian attempt) to do the same. These things take time to be done right, and even the West still has hiccups similar to the recent cold-weather-induced transportation fiasco this Lunar New Year.

Then again, how can China succeed when the crazy, left-wing, liberal, pinko-commie Western Media^TM is hell-bent on destroying their propaganda? Heck, even Adolf never had it this bad. Poor Rupert - it seems all his travails to placate the Chinese just keep falling up short - damn that villainous Grey Lady! Damn her straight to hell!

Double-duh

Captain Obvious has struck again!


When was the last time real median incomes increased? Not for a long, long time now, during an administration far, far away ...

(PS - I know the above graphic from the Detroit Free Press is not entirely correct, but it's just meant to be a visual illustration)

Duh-vos

I'm continually amazed at how idiotic arguments are not only respected, they actually carry intellectual weight!

His proposed remedy: a code of conduct. "I'm baffled by why SWFs don't get together and put an end to all this discussion by agreeing on some piece of paper that says: We're under no circumstances going to speculate in currencies; we're always going to be a long-term investor; we're never going to use our SWF to pursue any political objective."

The SWF managers protested, as one, that since they had never engaged in any of the activities that Summers expressed concern about, there was no reason to try to regulate them so. "You're talking about how to pre-emptively regulate something that may happen," said Muhammad Al Jasser of Saudi Arabia.

Yes, we are talking about pre-emptive regulation - you don't wait for sovereign fund to exercise political control and then try to legislate, that's just retarded (even if it is the status quo). What's even more amusing is that if these funds already are not engaging in these activities, they they're already compliant with the proposed code of conduct! Oh, wait ...

"We've had a lot of resistance to regulating the hedge funds, and the rating agencies, even though there were failures galore. So, let's be a little bit more balanced." Touché! Kristin Halvorson of Norway responded that while Norway would appreciate having some common rules, the hypothetical examples Summers cited "would never be possible in Norway."

Summers responded with an anecdote about how the Norwegian fund had sold short the shares of Icelandic banks, and the potential political complications those actions raised.

Yes, capitalism in the end does mean we're all just greedy fucks making a beast with [green]backs.

the crux of my problem with capitalism

It's like that Al Pacino quote in The Devil's Advocate,

Let me give you a little inside information about God. God likes to watch - he's a prankster. Think about it. He give man instinct. He gives you this extraordinary gift, and then what does He do? I swear for His own amusement, His own private, cosmic gag reel, He sets the rules in opposition. It's the goof of all time. Look but don't touch. Touch, but don't taste. Taste, don't swallow. Ahaha. And while you're jumpin' from one foot to the next, what is he doing? He's laughin' His sick, fuckin' ass off! He's a tight-ass! He's a SADIST! He's an absentee landlord! Worship that? NEVER!

In order for capitalism to work, you have to weight the incentives appropriately with respect to the outcomes. You don't want rogue traders? Penalize them so they are ruined, no the company (e.g., Barings). Although I am heartened to see that the dehumanizing corporate machine can still be damaged/destroyed by the actions of a single human being, for it signifies that all is not yet lost, it doesn't have to be like this. (That the dehumanizing corporate machine played a role in motivating them to hide their losses longer, and probably also tinged their feelings with more maliciousness than the news media will report, is a debate for a much longer entry.)

There is a very simple reason why corporate types never "learn": you want companies in dangerous industries to be safe and stop killing people? Set the financial incentives such that death carries such an unwieldy burden that companies will avoid it at literally any cost. Want people to stop polluting? Make it financially inconvenient. Since corporations are legally bound to seek profit, only those incentives that damage their profits (existing, or the ability to generate more) will be heeded. Stop treating inconveniences as "externalities" or think that lifecycle analyses are attempts to boil the ocean - if you penalize for noncompliance, it shall be done!

It is that simple.

complaint department, ground floor

I can't imagine what the denizens of an autocratic island paradise could possibly have complained about. Actually, the complaints sound like something out of high school, which might actually be a pretty good argument for the style of life there.

we heart Pakistan

Does this article ever give me confidence in our "allies" in Pakistan:

Kidwai said any decision on using a nuclear weapon would rest with the 10-member National Command Authority chaired by the president, "hopefully by consensus but at least by majority." The decision would be conveyed to the Strategic Plans Division and then through the military chain of command.

Kidwai acknowledged that two Pakistani nuclear scientists had met with Osama bin Laden in Kandahar, Afghanistan, during the rule of the Taliban regime. But a three-month investigation held after the Sept. 11 attacks on America had cleared the two men and established "nothing dangerous had happened."

So not only does it only take six (6) Pakistani officials to decide to launch a nuke, these same officials don't believe that meeting with Osama bin Laden constitutes danger! Seriously, what the fuck?

was it all slimy when it arrived?

snail mail earns its nickname!

So they can take the time to calculate a snail's trek, but they can also die flying to an air safety meeting? Does not compute!

Fans of information conveyance methodologies, rejoice!

awesome!

Awesome: redux! (this is also cool - another take on the below)

"Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know."

Hemingway quotes.

Agree: "All good books are alike in that they are truer than if they had really happened."

Yes! "That is what we are supposed to do when we are at our best - make it all up - but make it up so truly that later it will happen that way."

Me too: "All my life I've looked at words as though I were seeing them for the first time."

Concur: "All our words from loose using have lost their edge."

Disagree: "All modern American literature comes from one book by Mark Twain called Huckleberry Finn."

weeping

I felt extremely sympathetic to the plight of our nation's insurers when I read how they've struggled in the wake of 9/11 and Katrina. I mean, how terrible is this?

The loss ratio for property-casualty insurance companies, or the percentage of premiums paid out to policyholders as benefits, was 54.6 percent last year, according to the study, up from 53.3 percent in 2006 but far below the 75 percent level of the late 1980s.

The study — based on insurance industry data and companies' financial reports — estimates that the insurance industry's net income after taxes in 2007 will be $65 billion, down from the record $67.6 billion set in 2006 but above 2005's $48.8 billion.

I can understand how emotional someone can get over those numbers.

"The absence of any major storm or earthquake has allowed insurers to post two modestly profitable years. But it wasn't long ago, 2004 and 2005, when our industry suffered record natural-catastrophe losses," Marc Racicot, president of the American Insurance Association, said in a statement.

Certainly our incompetent government is partly to blame for this travesty.

Insurace companies have received about $4 billion in subsidies, the report says, since the federal Terrorism Risk Insurance Act took effect in November 2002 after insurers' costs from the Sept. 11 attacks hit $32 billion. The backstop under the act, in which the government agrees to reimburse insurers up to $100 billion in the event of another attack by foreign terrorists, was extended for another seven years under legislation enacted by Congress last month and signed into law by President Bush.

I mean, on top of all of this you have completely frivolous claims - how is one to cope? I'm surprised the insurers even stay in business.

No Wonder They Hate Us: Part 151,000 (and counting)

This is definitely a lowball estimate. I mean, some of the people trying to count the death toll ended up in the morgue!

Oh, and no matter the tactics, remember: Iraq isn't just a pure numbers game, it's about winning the hearts and minds of the broader Muslim community. We can achieve that simply by our disregard for international treaties and conventions, which illustrates that we have bigger guns (dicks) than any other nation and we are more willing (gay) to shove said weaponry down any opposition's throats (die, sandniggaz, die!).

My favorite tidbits:

To Jordan's offense [um - shouldn't that be "defense"?]
Maj. Kris Poppe, Jordan's attorney, said he argued that Jordan "faced these very serious charges for a long period of time, that he had been found not guilty of any offense related to the abuse of detainees, and that he had a stellar record."

Yes, that is significant because as we all know the statue of limitations is a very important matter in torture - just ask those 80-something Nazi war criminals how grateful they are that the minds of the world have forgotten their acts.

Rowe agreed. [no shit] "In light of the nature of the offense that Jordan had been found guilty of committing and the substantial evidence in mitigation at trial and in post-trial matters submitted by defense counsel, Rowe determined that an administrative reprimand was a fair and appropriate disposition of the matter," Joanna P. Hawkins, a military spokeswoman, said in a statement.

I mean, how serious of an offense is offending a suspected terrorist? It ranks right below a raspberry and just above giving someone's tongue a paper cut if I recall my CIA world torture guidebook correctly ...

Jordan: 'I'm gratified and glad'
"I'm still a little bit shocked by it all, but I'm gratified and glad that Gen. Rowe saw it for what it really is," he said. "I don't know if any officer needed to be held accountable, but I obviously don't believe it should have been me."

Obviously, since the accountability of decision-makers for horrible decisions is what makes Bush so popular in the US. Why shouldn't it be the same for the rest of the world - being so envious of our 'freedoms' after all, they should be ecstatic! Aren't all mens hearts and minds created equal in the eyes of our vengeful Christian God?

I've got yer ABM treaty right here!

Any wonder why Putin's anti-Western posturing is so popular among the majority of Russians? To wit:

Clinton did not venture into the Middle East to bring his stature to bear on negotiations between the Israelis and the Palestinians until his second term. His administration refused to submit the UN Kyoto Protocol on climate change for ratification and did not support the new International Criminal Court. But Clinton's charm and persuasion helped to shield America from criticism.

The Bush administration continued these policies, using a much blunter tone. It unilaterally withdrew from the Anti-Ballistic Missile Treaty it signed with the former Soviet Union in 1972, which forbade the testing and deployment of a ballistic missile defense system. It signed a pact with India, supporting its nuclear weapons program, which further undermined the nuclear nonproliferation treaty.

Yet when President Vladimir Putin of Russia suspended participation in the Treaty on Conventional Armed Forces in Europe last month, there was an outcry by the United States and the Europeans. They cast Putin as a potential spoiler of the post-Cold War order, ignoring what Washington had done earlier.

So far, neither Republican nor Democrat candidates have suggested returning to the ABM treaty.

holy tubs of lard, Batman!

How can people be so dumb? We're not sheep, we're cud-chewing cows. A couple highlights.

"Many obesity studies have shown that, in developed countries, the less educated you are, the more likely you are to become obese." = you're dumb

"She couldn't explain why her weight had got to this extreme point, but suggested to me that being born premature may have been a factor." = you're fucking stupid. Here's an explanation: you consumed more calories than you expended. It ain't yo momma's fault, it's fucking YOURS!

it's all downhill from there

LMFAO!

Lip service to South Africa’s new kissing law:
Teens express outrage with public displays of affection

"We're young. We need to experiment," Natalie Winston, 12, said before the protest here. "When you're 21, you're old already, and ugly."

Obviously this naive young lady has never seen a porn film (and should, post-haste!). Or underwear models. Or women in general, lol. I love the added insult of "and ugly," at the end, that's really high class!

bredia mainwashing

What are the odds? How can people be so seriously paranoid?

again, the myth of the liberal media

I could go on for many pages, but this example sums up the argument nicely:

Thus, in 1994, Time celebrated the Republican victory in the midterm elections by putting a herd of charging elephants on its cover. But its response to the Democratic victory of 2006—a victory in which House Democrats achieved a larger majority, both in seats and in the popular vote, than the Republicans ever did in their 12-year reign—was a pair of overlapping red and blue circles, with the headline "The center is the place to be."

Remember George W. and his "mandate"? Bush won essentially by one state (Ohio, which I believe could have easily been rigged). In contrast, when Clinton was unquestionably demolished Dole in 1996 for re-election (supposedly as the Republicans were surging in popularity), he never made the same type of grandiose statement about the power vested in him.

This is why I always feel like the Democrats play nicer/more humbly at politics than (and get burned harder for it by) the Republicans. I also find it ironic that Republican candidates of extremely dubious experience (Reagan) are touted as heroes, yet candidates like Clinton (and Obama especially) are consistently questioned about their experience. Why isn't the same standard applied to the likes of Mitt Romney - what experiences make him any better suited for President than Clinton? Than Obama? Because he wants to 'double' Guantanamo? Morons.

Of course, the conservative counter-argument is that the ones in power shouldn't gloat, lest they reveal their power and suffer the wrath of the misled public. But wait, do the Reps take their own advice? See above.