failure alert!

Bush fails again. What, did he look into Medvedev's "soul" as well, the fucking retard? Not that his failure matters, since he neither reads the news or listens to anyone but his parroting yes-men lackeys. The "CEO" President couldn't be any more apt in prescribing exactly his idiotic shortcomings.

still a lame excuse

... rationalizing stupidity doesn't make it any less stupid or any less a person's choice. It's the 'everyone else jumped off a bridge' argument, except in this case it's 'everyone else around me appeared to make superficial choices, so I took that to mean I didn't have to think through my own actions ..." SHEEP!

In other news, yay for freedom! haha I wonder if they use the same argument for freedom of speech as they do for the definition of porn: "I'll recognize a breach of your civil liberties when I see one."

the face of tyranny in Zimbabwe

Stunningly brave. I bet the Guardian helped pay for his extrication. Heck, with Zimbabwe's inflation, they probably bought first class tickets for him and his family to Tahiti!

I'm OK to dwive, honesht
In other news, researchers at the University of Michigan claim that the nearly-insignificant difference in crash statistics between two equally stupid systems for the legal drinking age finds that one severely stupid system is only slightly less idiotic than the other.

Stunning amounts of time and money were exerted, and no one mentioned the pink elephant in the room: make the legal drinking age LOWER than the legal driving age, and you'll have less drunk-driving accidents. This proposition appears counter-intuitive only to idiots, which is why the US has not adopted it.

a bad PR day in biofuels
Is there no such thing as bad PR? I would think a "secret" report by the World Bank on the economic damage being caused by biofuels would be considered, um, pretty bad.

Most people are not going to blame the terrible choices of biofuel feedstock which have been made (corn ethanol is bullshit, and clearing virgin rain forest for palm oil is even more putrid bullshit). What will stick in people's minds is the massive spike in food prices attributed (largely) to these ridiculously inefficient or improperly deployed crops.

The only silver lining? At least the report makes Bush look bad! :o)

hire marx four being emfatik!

In a way, the teacher could be implying that maybe the room was such a shithole it deserved an exclamation mark!

I don't think the examiner was being broad-minded enough. Maybe "room" could be taken in the global, socio-economic sense as "room to grow." I mean, on the one hand, some plunderer's are getting rich exploiting and enabling the Chinese regime. On the other, not everyone takes such action lying down.

I would've asked for more clarity from the youth on which stance he was against.

How do you say 'hallelujah' in Martian?

Is it holy water? I'm waiting until the Martian bacteria accept their Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ, into their tiny microbial hearts.

a typical day in the office

The threat of "inadvertent" nuclear apocalypse keeps us sharp!

Good to know we haven't backed away too far from the brink!

And the every-pressing question, has Hiroshima become too normal?

idle talk

A good article on the benefits of turning off your car instead of letting it idle.

school-shooting drive-by?

Next one that happens, you know you can blame Obama!

apoplectic

Now this is a word I like! The Dictionary.com definition is more technical, but Merriam-Webster's captures the modern usage very succinctly:

apoplectic

1: of, relating to, or causing stroke
2: affected with, inclined to, or showing symptoms of stroke
3: of a kind to cause or apparently cause stroke (an apoplectic rage); also : greatly excited or angered (was apoplectic over the news)

nerdkore

Ewe ar such a NERD!

In the land of the recently freed from prison

"They hate us for our freedom."

Yes, King Shrub, that and our peace-loving way of life, lol.

Make-mud Ahma - Ajabadah .. babajabadah ... goo-goo, ga-ga

In another conspiracy of non-reporting by devil-worshipping, gay liberal abortionist baby-raping Western capitalist-whore journalists, Iranian President Mahmud Ahmadinejad was actually correct when he stated there were no homosexuals in Iran. That is true. They have all fled elsewhere to seek asylum, lol.

taser-on-taser violence

See, after the Virginia Tech shootings, some people thought the only solution was to better arm teachers. I agree. Giving weapons to inadequately trained civilians is, in general, an effective deterrent from deadly violence. In fact, the only solution to most violent confrontations is more violence. It's not like easy access to weaponry can escalate otherwise innocuous situations into a life-or-death struggle, people simply don't behave that way. People are nearly always rational and react in proportion to the affront dealt them.

Take this case for instance. The only clear solution to this horrible display of taser-on-taser violence is more tasers. Imagine if the van had a taser how much easer of a time it would've had defending itself against both men and short-circuiting their violent intents altogether. Why are lawmakers so blind to such obvious, simple, eminently workable solutions? Goddamned left-wing conspirators ... if we left it to the crazy Belgians, we'd all have drowned in our own impotence already.

You know, we always seem to come to an impasse in this country when it comes to guns. I believe we, as Americans, should just stick to the things we know how to do and do well, like teaching people how to drink responsibly.

(and drive even better - I wonder if the two are related?)

why they hate us, part 1 trillion

Hmmm ... a trillion for wanton destruction, and a paltry 1 billion (promised aide feeds no mouths) for helping people eat.

What was that about hearts and minds? Apparently there is no space in the agenda for stomachs. I mean, how could anyone truthfully assert that we have our priorities anywhere but in exactly the right place? It's not like the haves try to instigate the have-nots. However, to be fair, people have actually done the acts depicted, and in the name of Islam. So why do people get so offended by the replaying of facts? These things happened. It is offensive to Muslims to blame all Islam because of the acts of a few, this is true, but this is also known as freedom of speech. We give you the freedom to worship whatever you like, a freedom which many Islamic countries do not have, and you cannot choose your freedoms piecemeal - they come as a set, take them all or leave them all.

secondary intelligence

Very clever indeed - much more clever than using contraceptives. How did the mother not notice her daughter was pregnant? That's kind of a difficult thing to hide, even if you are tubby.

the decider

So first he tells our enemies to bring it on, then he blames the servicemen for his televised premature ejaculation (of 'victory') bullshit media stunt.

This is the behavior of a "war-time" President? Not in living memory ...

This just in!
Iraqis everywhere are bathing in the sweet smell of victory!

Ave Ma-lmfao

I had trouble deciding whether to add this to my YouTube playlist as "comedy" or "music" ... when the wind catches his papal ... whatever that thing is on his shoulders, he looks like a cute little white Nazi eagl- dove, like a peace-loving, non-anti-aircraft firing Hitler youth dove.

canufacturing monsent

This is how we do.

not so crazy after all

Rudy Giuliani was one of the few who defended Barack Obama when he rattled the sabre in Pakistan's direction. Turns out the US military also seems to think that the junior senator from Illinois isn't so crazy after all.